EP180: The Blessing of Death | Stephen Garrett

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There are few things that are certain in life – and death is one of those.

Death has always been seen as the conclusion of life. But for Stephen Garrett, he sees new beginnings and opportunities in death to cultivate positivity and powerful change. Stephen is a death coach, but it hasn’t always been the case. For some time, he served people as a life coach but noticed that while this enabled people to change their lives, it is often short-lived. He observed, however, that death is a more potent tool to create profound and long-lasting changes.

He believes that we must face and embrace death instead of avoiding it. In this episode, we discussed the emotions that accompany death and share our own experiences dealing with the death of loved ones, and people close to us who have also struggled with grief and loss.

Just some of the things we covered today are:

• The deeper purpose of being a death educator and coach, and the process of getting rid of grief which is not done alone, and must be received by another individual without judgment (1:40).
• The Dying to Live experience/program he does with his clients and my emotional experience of writing my own eulogy (6:20).
• Seeing death as a teacher, friend, and ally, instead of an enemy, and allowing it to inspire life instead of discouraging it (11:17; 1:01:12).
• Present day fear of death caused by lack of practice and exposure, unlike 150 years ago when the natural cycle of life is more apparent through nature, home and family (12:23).
• How our demeanor towards elders reflect our fear of death (14:03).
• The markers/signposts of grief, and why Stephen does not want to necessarily use the term ‘stages’,
• and his take on how Shakespeare described parting as a sweet sorrow (22:41).
• Stephen’s insights on the grief associated with infertility, stillbirth, babies, and children dying (27:28).
• How love/joy and grief/sorrow are correlated, and the difficulty getting over these feelings (32:39).
• The point when grief and sorrow become unhealthy, the potential effects of suppressing or dwelling too much on sorrow, and how to balance the darkness with the lightness (40:20).
• The significance of practicing gratitude amidst challenges, and how it allows us to manage our priorities and see what’s important in our life (45:04).
• Grieving relationships to get emotional and mental baggage out, and what you can do for someone who is grieving (52:33).
• The two components of the grieving process, the role of rituals and exercises in the appreciation of the life or relationship that was lived and experienced (58:26).
• Experiencing loneliness in the spiritual and physical plane, and the inevitable attachment after a loss (1:03:35).
• Loving someone who has experienced grief and loss (1:09:22).

To connect with Stephen and other related links, see below:
Stephen Garrett | Author, Coach & Educator
Phone: 604-328-7054
Email: stephen [at] embraceyourdeath.com
Alive In Death | Death, Dying, Grief and Self-Care Training for Health Care Providers
Begin with the End in Mind – 7 Habits of Highly Effective People | Stephen Covey

The reality is relationships aren’t just about the good times – hardships, breakups, and even death happen. This life-changing and riveting conversation allowed me to gain a deeper understanding of love, relationships and the cycle of life, and I hope it did the same for you.

If you have questions, feedback, or suggestions on the episode or the show, I’d love to hear it – email us at info [at] theintimatelifestyle.com.

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